What an unbelievable celebration! Last night, Idaho witnessed its first-ever Chassidic wedding. The energy and dancing were something from a different universe.
There were so many elements of our daughter’s wedding last night that I am still digesting – the emotional Chupah, the amazing Glatt Kosher dinner in one of Idaho’s most tasteful venues, and the lively dancing for hours and hours.
But, above them all, I’m absorbing the beauty of two souls merged as one. Seeing Mendel and Mushka together – smiling and supporting each other – is a joy that no word other than nachas can describe.
The celebration continues tomorrow with a Grand Kiddush luncheon and Sheva Brachos, sponsored by our loving and supportive community. In Jewish tradition, we rejoice with the Bride and Groom for an entire week.
This week’s parsha Shoftim adds another insight into the magic of newlyweds.
In speaking of the laws of warfare, the Torah states that a newly married man shall not head to war. In fact, he is sent home if he volunteers for battle.
Next week’s parsha adds more detail: When a man takes a new wife, he shall not go out in the army, nor shall he be subjected to anything associated with it. He shall remain free for his home for one year and delight his wife, whom he has taken.
As important as national security may be, he is not the right person to go to battle. Rather, he needs to delight his wife.
While we celebrate for a week with the Bride and Groom, their own internal celebration needs to last an entire year.
It’s beautiful that the Torah guides newlyweds to invest in their marriage. But, why does it come in the context of warfare? Couldn’t we have just included this in the beautiful description of marriage itself?
Rather, it is precisely this message the Torah wants us to hear.
Warfare is not pretty. But, sadly, at times it is a critical necessity for the survival of a nation. The devotion of soldiers to their country and fellow citizens is unparalleled. They literally give up their lives for their nation.
And, this is what the Torah wants to impart to a young couple. It’s not enough to celebrate good moments together. Love is not simply about having a good time, enjoying a nice vacation, or sharing hobbies and interests.
The entirety of the first year must be a year of making each other happy. It must be a year of total devotion – giving selflessly to each other. Celebrating each other and admiring each other. Nothing – not even warfare – can stand in the way of their joyous commitment to each other and to establishing a home built on solid, Torah-based foundations.
We will celebrate with the Bride and Groom for a week. But, we will bless them – and cheer them on – to continue celebrating for an entire year. This will surely give them the tools and strength to continue delighting in each other for many, many years to come.
Mazal Tov Mendel and Mushak! Here’s to a year of joy – which will undoubtedly turn into a lifetime of joy!