Learning on the Job

Some people argue that part of my rabbinic credentials lie in my reliable tardiness.  That still would not be sufficient excuse for the inability to find the time to transcribe some thoughts on this week’s Torah portion, Yitro.

I do, however, have a decent defense this time.

You see, once a year, during the weekend commemorating the passing of Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka Schneersohn obm, Chabad-Lubavitch Shluchos (Rebbetzins) from around the world gather in New York for an annual conference. These great women spend much-deserved time together studying, sharing, schmoozing and maybe just breathing a breath of fresh (and freezing) air.  It’s a weekend of inspiration, guidance and camaraderie that is unparalleled.  In fact it’s the largest Jewish feminine convention.

So, that leaves me home alone with five children. A great opportunity to bond with my kids and let my other responsibilities slip to the back burner.  Some might call me Rabbi Mom, as does this article.

Contemplating this wonderful opportunity and challenge, the words in this week’s portion really sunk in.  In the world of Shluchim (Chabad Lubavitch Rabbis), this is wife appreciation week!

In instructing Moses to convey to the Jewish people His choosing them and charging them with the Torah, G-d states: “So shall you say to the house of Jacob and tell the sons of Israel.”

Rashi explains the double-language as follows:

“So shall you say to the house of Jacob,” refers to the women. Say it to them in a gentle language.  “And tell the sons of Israel,” refers to the males, tell them things that are as harsh as wormwood.

One thing that remains unexplained is why the women come first. Certainly, it fits with modern protocol, but there must be a spiritual perspective as well.

Pragmatic teaching is usually the best. This week I learned – in the trenches – why the women come first. Without the spiritual fortitude and patience, the softness and warmth of a woman’s heart, no man would be able to live the life of Torah.

So, Esther and all the other dedicated female community leaders, thanks for teaching me and many others this important lesson.