At Independence Day, our patriotism is on full display.
But, I still get questions like this:
“Rabbi, I hate paying taxes. Do I have to do it anyway? I always have a barbecue on July 4 and we have an awesome fireworks display. My family gets together on Thanksgiving and a huge American flag hangs on our front porch. We donate to various veterans organizations and I understand the importance of American democracy and culture. But I think the government wastes too much money and I don’t feel like paying taxes. In fact, I’m willing to give more to charitable causes rather than pay Uncle Sam.”
When I get questions like this, I often try to put things in context. Let’s forget a moment about legalities and moral obligations. Let us put aside the virtues and vices of current American government and politics.
If your mother asks you to do something you disagree with, or to do something differently than the way you would do it, what would you do? You might try to discuss the issue and convince her of your way. But what if she remains adamant and refuses to budge? She wants it done, and she wants it done her way.
She may not get too far if the conversation is based solely on perspective and rationale. We sometimes simply see things differently.
But, what if she simply said to you, “I know, dear, that you see it differently. But, please just do it for me.”
Chances are your position would change. You might still feel differently about it. But your relationship with your mother runs deeper than your viewpoint on any given matter. The beauty of a genuine relationship is that it surpasses logic. If it were based solely on rationale, there would be a part of us that could remain disconnected. But doing something that you don’t understand – just for the sake of your mother – allows you to demonstrate how important she is in your life, and how much you wish to satisfy her needs. Denying her request may not violate your values or outlook, but it would violate the sanctity of the relationship.
Doing something for another because the person is meaningful to us can bring us closer than when we do things for another because the activity makes sense to us.
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In this week’s parsha, Chukat, the Torah emphasizes one of the three categories of mitzvot, called Chukim. Chukim are supra-rational laws of the Torah.
Some commandments in the Torah are understandably easy for us to embrace. Even if the Torah did not prohibit murder, we would accept it as a critical and justified law. These types of mitzvot are called Mishpatim. Other laws would not be as obvious to us. But taken in context, they make sense. Eating unleavened bread for 8 days might seem bizarre. But, once we are familiar with the Passover story, we see it as a reasonable – indeed, meaningful – tradition.
Chukim, however, are commandments that continue to baffle us. No matter how hard we try, we cannot understand the reasons for the laws of ritual purity, or why we shouldn’t wear garments of wool and linen.
When we encounter these supra-rational laws we might decide to draw the line. We may think to ourselves, “I love Judaism. I wear a Star of David necklace and I go to shul regularly. I volunteer at the Jewish center. My home proudly boasts a mezuzah and all my co-workers know that I take off for Yom Kippur. But, I sometimes feel deeply embarrassed by the archaic laws of the Torah I just can’t wrap my mind around. That’s where I simply check out. These laws don’t inspire me, nor do they seem justified. So I simply drop them from my regiment of Jewish life.”
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This week’s parsha reminds us that Judaism isn’t simply a religion. It’s about a relationship with our Creator.
And the deepest – most patriotic – part of our relationship is doing things that demonstrate our profound love and bond with our Father in Heaven. They may not seem as romantic. But they take us to a place that generous tzedakah and nostalgic Passover Seders can’t access.